"I just wish they would leave me alone."

By god, I love this woman. Thana is a true hero of New York City. Not only is she cleaning the streets up of grimey, shit bag men, but she's so damn stylish while doing it. Who needs to say words when your presence is so powerful? Why else are these dudes drawn to her so easily? She just wants to get by unnoticed, and they won't leave her alone.

Ms .45…

"Hope is smashable, realism is not."

I'm not entirely sure how to talk about Poor Things. The first time I watched this film, it made me deeply uncomfortable. It was a feeling that I looked back on as unnecessary and an exaggeration of my view on the portrayal of sex in film. I sat with those feelings for a week or so before deciding that my comfortably with Bella's life choices doesn't matter. "We are the masters of our own…

"Spy? Why don't you just call the police?"

God dammit this movie sucks, but its got charm. It's not often that someone starts singing Shwayze in general let alone in a horror film. Nothing is actually scary, and this is some of the worst acting I have ever seen, but somehow the simplicity and immature 2009 teen comedy works in making this feel like a solid TV Halloween special. This might be bad, but I like it.

I watched this…

"She found the intersection."

Okay, this shit is cool! Masters of Horror never ceaces to amaze me in one way or another. I go in blind, so I didn't catch the title of the episode, but I was very excited to see this is an adaptation of an H.P. Lovecraft story, and who else is better to direct it than the man who makes Lovecraft films? Knowing Mick Garris, I bet that was intentional. Stuart Gordon does some kick ass…

"Didn't do it. Lawyer fucked me!"

I hate to be a part of the hive mind when I say that The Shawshank Redemption is one of the best movies ever made. Its slow, uneventful, artistically unoriginal, and arguably boring. Yet, its so damn powerful that I cant help but love and praise it. There is no other film in existence that I spent a literal week watching on loop and some how not tire of the thing. Two and a…

Don't insult a man's cooking.

I am bewildered. I don't want to be sucking Eggers dick here, but he's got a pretty good track record of making good movies. This one happens to be one of them. Much like the other two films I have seen of his, these aren't films you can watch any time. You really have to want to go through something like this. It's not inherently fun or satisfying at any point. Other than that seagull,…