At last, a movie about the gilded trappings of fame!

The final word on the monkey:
- For the most part, the monkey is surprisingly functional, and I quite like it, even if just because it's a monkey.
- At times, the monkey is unnecessarily disturbing and distracting, like when he's a kid, or when the monkey has a curly li'l perm.
- This monkey gambit is completely ridiculous, and I can't believe they did it, even if I do enjoy it.

The set pieces are incredible, and I actually have a bit of a soft spot for Robbie Williams (Northern English boy with Irish ancestry usually does it). But beyond the pageantry it's all a bit same-samey, which feels wild to say about a cocaine-addicted monkey movie (EDIT: I also briefly may have overlooked the MONKEY KNIFE FIGHT. Hold on to your dreams, lovelies). Would probably get a higher rating for the sheer spectacle of seeing it on a big screen. For now, it (not really) loses half a star because the of a dad gets an 11th hour redemption. That's on you, Robert.